Many bloggers post their random thoughts. It's my turn. Unfortunately for you, I'm no Otis. He manages to put his random musings together in such a way as to make it seem insightful and profound. In contrast, this will seem unfocused and will likely leave you feeling unsettled. It may cause a metallic taste in your mouth. You might even think you wet yourself. No, wait. That's what I tell patients who are about to receive IV contrast. In any event, you've been warned.
Tomorrow morning I will sign a contract to start my new job in California. It's very good money, even though it's a huge pay cut. There is almost no price I'd be willing to pay to be with my family, so I'm okay with the lower dollar figure. I'm certain it will be used against me in the argument about why I shouldn't buy a Ferrari, and that bothers me far more than it should.
It's not the perfect job, but it's damn good. I will only work 4 days a week and still get 6 weeks of vacation. No weekends and no call. Good, no great, people to work with who are really excited that I'm joining the team. Challenging work.
The downside is that I'm leaving a dream job, and a job I feel very comfortable with, for the unknown. I don't fear change. The military fixed that. I just try to live my life without regret, and I never want to regret leaving this job in Washington. I'm surrounded by good people who value my opinion. Just today I was talking with another radiologist. He makes the schedule and he was forced to make me double cover every day this week. I told him I didn't mind because I like being the "go-to" guy when things get tough. I take pride in that and I do it willingly.
The other negative is that, even though I'm closer to my family and will spend many more nights at home, I'll still have to get a place near the imaging center because it's 90 miles away from Palo Alto. It still kind of feels like I'm not all the way there. At least I don't have to go to the airport twice a week and deal with shitty flight attendants and the worst on-time record of any airline in forever. Damned Alaska Airlines.
I don't need sympathy. I don't need a pep talk. I know it's better because it's closer. I get all that. I just want it to be perfect. Is that too much to ask?