Wednesday, December 19, 2012

The End of the World - 2012

I wrote an email with no "to" address. It was a will of sorts. I did it before I left for Mastodon 2012 based on the non-zero chance that I might die during the festivities. I think the email is still in my draft folder, actually. I survived, making the necessity of the will somewhat less important, but I won't delete it just yet. You see, the world is ending on Friday.

Of course, this begs the question, why write a will that no one will read? If we're all dead, then it's kind of a moot point, innit? Well, technically that's true. Unfortunately, I have some bad news for you. You're all not real. You're just a construct in my mind. The only real thing in this universe is my existence and my perception. I know, this comes as a bit of a shock, especially since you are under the (mistaken) impression that you are, in fact, real. You're not, but you shouldn't let that get you down. Being something created especially for me is actually an honor. Of the billions and billions of people on this planet, only a few actually got to know me. If you are reading this, you are one of those creations. Congratulations! I'm sure you can take some satisfaction in the astronomical odds of being one of the lucky few.

Since you are all just figments of my imagination, you are in for a bit of a shock. Just as there was a non-zero chance of me dying at Mastodon, there is also a non-zero chance of me dying on Friday. In fact, this whole Mayan thing may have be pre-ordained before I was "born" in order to signal the end of this simulation. You see, if I die, existence is no more. "End simulation," to quote Star Trek. Don't fear the end though, you all played a big part in my game.

It's not a traditional game with winners and losers, of course. In the future I come from, I imagine that the only reality is one of the mind. Resources have been depleted. Famine and pestilence got rid of the rest. The lucky few were able to take advantage of the superb technology to allow some (like me) to go back in history and live at a time where true happiness could be attained. That time was the years 1967 through 2012. "But I remember time before 1967!" some of you might be saying. Sorry, you only think you remember that. Those memories were implanted in your program to give you more realism - for me, of course.

So it comes down to this. If I pass this Friday, thank you all for playing your parts and staying in character. If all goes well, I'm going to ask the mods to send me right back to 1967. I'd like to do this one more time. I wouldn't change a thing. Well, that's not entirely true. I'd like the chance to tell Maggie M that walking behind her up the stairs in 1982 and staring at her Jordache jeans was a spiritual moment for me. I wonder how that would alter my timeline...

4 comments:

Michele Blanck said...

Filthy Maggie??? Thats what you took from your past...that is the lasting memory you take with you to the end of the world?

On behalf of all of the other avatars in your life game...bite me.

DrChako said...

Not Maggie F. Maggie M, from Dad's softball team.

-DrC

The Sister of DrChako and Mrs. Chako said...

If I'm not actually "real", did I really need to come to work today? I think not. I'm going home.

dhubermex said...

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